Dan Rocks the Big Brother House

(image credit: http://therealhoh.tumblr.com/)

This week, BB14 fans witnessed the most unbelievable move in the history of Big Brother. It was shocking, masterfully played, and hugely successful.

Dan, the winner of Big Brother 10 is back in the house for season 14. A few weeks ago, five players formed an alliance called the “Quack Pack” (alliance’s in Big Brother are way cooler when they have a name — e.g. Chilltown and The Brigade.) Ian, part of the Quack Pack, betrayed former teammates Frank and Boogie but Dan (also in the Quack Pack) was assumed to be the perpetrator and took the blame. Dan did not sell out his ally Ian and this made him a huge target. This week, he found himself on the block at the hand of Frank. (FYI – Players on the block may get voted out, if they do not get removed from the block by the power of veto.)

In this week’s veto competition, players had to accept punishments to win points. Dan took a punishment of a 24 hour solitary dance party (which of course, means he was locked in a room alone for 24 hours with dance music playing.)  There was no dancing, he used that time to think. And boy did he think. When he emerged, he made the biggest big brother play EVER.

1. He gathered all of the house guests for “Dan’s funeral” and said heartfelt goodbyes to everyone as if he believed he was going to be voted off.  The entire house was in tears, including hot Shane (aka Captain America.)

2. Especially tearful was Dan’s closest ally Danielle whom he called out saying she had betrayed him. “You know what you did and you are dead to me,” pretty harsh. She had not betrayed him in any way and could not figure out why he said that. She was a blubbering mess and received lots of consolation from hot Shane. (Shane really is hot.)

3. Dan then called his worst enemy, and head of household (who has all of the power for the week), Frank in to a private meeting  saying he wanted to read something to him from the Bible (the only book allowed in the Big Brother house). He instead used the Bible to swear on as he revealed the Quack Pack and Ian’s role in the betrayal.  He then convinced Frank (his WORST enemy!) to take him OFF the block and replace him with Brittany, one of Dan’s Quack Pack allies (who, also, by the way, is hilarious and will be missed.)  Note: Although Frank was rip roaring mad at Ian, Ian could not be put on the block because he held one of two power of vetos this week.  This game is complicated, I know, stay with me.

4. Jenn, Frank’s newest ally (and my current favorite player,) held an unusual second power of veto this week so Frank convinced Jenn to use her veto to take Dan off the block and Frank replace him with Brittany.

(image credit: bigbrotherjunkies.com)

5. Finally, Dan pulls Danielle (the blubbering mess) aside and explains to her that she has NOT betrayed his trust and this was all a ploy to keep her safe because SHE is also on the block and if everyone feels super sorry for her, they will vote Brittany off instead of Danielle. Brilliant.

Did I mention that all of this played out while Frank was wearing a carrot suit, one of his punishments for the week?

This was the most amazing thing that has ever happened on Big Brother. Master manipulation at its best. People, can you NOT see how dangerous Dan is? Vote him out!!!!! But now, Brittany is gone, Dan remains, and this week has gone down in Big Brother history (see Entertainment Weekly).

You either saw the episode and have relived it through my not so masterful story telling, you have been moderately entertained by my rendition, or you don’t care. But as a Big Brother fan, and an amateur TV blogger, this event could not go unmentioned on the Tales of a Recovering TVaholic blog.

Perhaps we should all try a 24 hour solitary dance party to solve our biggest problems! Who’s in?

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